The Holidays

Wow! It has been sooo long since I've posted anything on here. I guess my attitude was no one is really reading it so why bother but I need to do it for myself.
After the moving setback and all the stress it created- I've been trying to make a conscious decision to not say anything to anybody until it's a done deal. I feel like the whole situation made me look flaky and I am not flaky. When I make plans, I stick with it and usually do what I say. Also, I had to get my old job back working part time at the school which is better than nothing but not the best. I know I am talented but constantly give my power away and it upsets and frustrates me. Especially hearing how great people are doing. I was so tired with living in NY -
well, not so true but things weren't happening for me like 4 others and I admit- I was not aggressive enuf- I did not focus on my careeer enough and I am not at the point in my life that I want to be career wise. At least I am now It some casting places-
I have to keep that going. I wish we could live in NY- I am always so happy there but if we move it better be to a big city or I just can't handle it. My goal this year is to get more money and enjoy doing things I like to get more creative ideas. Fancy res'ts can wait- I'm just as happy hanging with my friends ans eating bar food. OK I have not done that in a while but it's about who u are with- not where u are. And you have to be happy with yourself before u can be happy with others.
Lots of setbacks but I will continue on my journey. I am not going to quit or hide in the corner- My time is coming!!!!

OK- here I go- I haven't written on here in a while because a lot it going on but I'm still sitting in the same place. Things seem to take a lot longer than u think and
it would be great if we could just know what the right thing would be or say but we don't and we do the best we can. Somerimes we win and people like us and sometimes
for no reason at all- we get the cold shoulder but remember it isn'i us- it is them.
Everyone has something they are dealing with but noone ever really knows. That's what being human is.
My husband is back until Sunday and then I won't see him for awhile again but next time he has 3 days extra leave time- no he does not work for the army but the company is run like an army- Feel like an Atmy Wife- We are close to selling our place and I pray everything goes smoothly and these people get their mortgage. So now realisitically- I'll prob be here until Nov or even middle of Nov- I'm OK with that- tons to do and they wanted a closing date of Oct 20- ironically I never would have had the guts to leave my part- time job I've had at a college for over 3 yrs if this opportunity did not come up. Now I can try to do extra work- not thats so much better but I really need to be around people. My sisters' coming in next week from LA and my mom has to get another biopsy Tues- she had a lumpectomy 2 yrs ago- they think it is just scar tissue and I pray it is because isn't it weird for cancer to come back in same exact place- I do not know but I pray she will be OK- Dads' Alzheimers is getting worse everyday - so much worse than last year and it makes me so sad to think one day he won't even recognize me. I am sad now It was World Alzheimers WeeKlast week and Celebrity Millionaire donate all their money to Alzheimers. Wish they could find a cure.
Tired now- will try to write more consistently more now that I have a clearer head.
Be grateful for your health

Make Yourself a Priority First

I'm lonely now. My husband accepted a job down South and now life goes on here and I am really realizing how dreary it is up here. At least when he was here, there was someone to talk to and ignore- now noone. My closest friends in building are leaving Fri for vacation Fri for 10 days and i am still working for the school. In between that, still have people looking at apt ay moments notice and have an OH coming up this weekend. If I still lived in city, I wouldn't feel so isolated. Now- How is it going to be down South? I'll have to try to meet some people like me- crazy as it sounds. Some Southern folk that like to do comedy, theater or whatever. This is a lot my fault. I just let my passions slide and now the highlight of my night is cooking chicken for my cat. Well, his birthday is tomorrow! Not so pathetic. At least I have my postcards to pick up Fri and will make an appt to visit that theatrical agency. Typical I do things when I will be out the door- I just pray his job gets better and he eases into it without burning himself out or else no move ans back to the old drawing board- Always seem to be going back to the old drawing board- like GroundHogs Day- the movie. God Help Us All!!! No LOL

Changes

Change is very scary, It seem sso easy when u are younger. I used to moce a lot in my 30's and that was considered iunstable- so then when i pretty much become stabulized ina few different living situations, all of a sudden, another move Becomes like cement being poured all over my body. It was easier movinmg around NY- Even moving up to Westchester was traumatic but Atlanta, alabama- Well, my husband will be working in Alabama and we will live near Atlanta. My friend said to me- Well, you lived in Arizona didn't you? That was college- ample opportunity oo meet people when you are young and in school. Mot so easy when you are older and have no kids. The only things I should focus on is working. meeting peopele there and comedy places and casting agencies. I know they have them down there. What else am I supposed to do? I need a change though. This is stifling up here and it hopefully has to be better. I just hope everything goes smoothly and must have faith and trust. The cats - I worry about them driving down but would much rather that than in the plane. All details must be worked out carefully. Crossing fingers.

It is July 23- Can't believe summers' flying. This is the first summer I really don't care about color- Also- going to dermatologist to check out my skin in early August so don't want to overdo it. Also, it's been so HUMID out- it's almost toxic walking outside. Nothing else going on- still trying to sell the place, pictures at least came out well, oh- yes- the Japanese guy who has been cutting my hair for yrs really flipped yesterday- cut some layers way shorter on one side and when I said something that it looks shorter- he says- I've been cutting your hair for years- You still don't trust me- I'm thinking- Welll, we were enemies in WW 2!!! So like on purpose- he tortures me becasue all I got was a haircut and think he was pissed
because I usually get a treatment also. I mean it's not like bangs or anything but like the economy is hitting everyone- HELLO- don't take it out on me. You know- nice has it's limits- you know. I like that.!!! Anyone- must go now so tired- have to work the phones tomorrow for a bit. Nie

Pray

I have lots of stuff going on and I am tired but must continue the fight- Some things come asier to others and some people can take more suffering or whatever. I really pray the economy gets better and we can sell this place and still enjoy the summer. Nothing's easy and those that have it easy find other things to complain about.

Thanks for listening- Good Night!

Limbo

I feel limboish lately. We may be moving to Alabama and I really am OK with that- close to Atlanta but the cats going on a plane!!!. Elvis bad tartar and gums!- will the vet give them health certificates? If my husband gets the offer and everything works out- he goes first until the move is worked out- I'm not keen on being here alone for most of the week but maybe I can focus on myself again- that part will be good. Elvis will miss Frank so much. I just pray whatever way it goes, the cat ordeal goes smoothly- If the cats don't go- I can't leave them!

Maybe it will work out another way and he'll get something closer. We can't even sell the place- Bad Market, Economy- Oil spill continues to get worse- need a change- a good one!!!

Tired- TBC- Nins

Moods

I'm not in a good moood and I didn't want to pretend to be or have to act happy. I am almost xxx yrs old and no more acting- Unless, of course- I'm getting paid for it. I'm sick of BS from people and family memebers but u know what- I am strong and no matter what- I'll be OK- I've never had an easy time of it but also admit the last several yes have been tough. moving up here, going from job to job- both my husband and I not having steady income- well, it's a bit scary and now the future? Who knows what will happen- Can it get worse? Yup!! Let's pray it gets better and think of all these homeless people and the oil spill that has affected so many lives and the environment and the wildlife- So sad- and the poor soldiers who have died for this stupid war and this gov't pathetically run and you know- it keeps everything in perspective.

When Pets go to Heaven

I just found out recently a very good friend of mine cats' passed away. She was 19- nice,long life and a beautiful cat. Even though the cat lived a long life, it doesn't make the loss any less sad. It affects everyone who knew the cat and her whole family- she has a son and I know how sad it is to lose a pet especially as a child.

I remember we grew up having a family dog- he lived to be almost 14 and was loved by us so much but he was more the family dog. I remember yrs later, at 33 I finally got my first pet. A beautiful orange tabby named Bowie. He was not nice to others but was always sweet and loving to me. I got him a kitten about 2 yrs later, Amanda- She loved him so much too and vice-versa- Well, she looked like him also and they got along splendidly but then she got fixed and never woke up from the anesthesia. I remember telling the vet she seemed like she had a cold- she was sickly when i adopted her- rubnt of the litter they said- and I had to feed her with a little syringe, felt so badly she died. My cat Bowie slept with me that night- He knew I was so sad. I sometimes would come home after drinking and play fist fight with him- He hated alcohol and did not like this behavior. Another cat was adopted, Roxie- a beautiful calico- she adored Bowie- it was never quite the same relationship he had with Amanda but he was always very nice to her and they quickly became buddies. Bowie was 7 and got very sick while I was living in NYC, He would not eat and was yellow. I took him to Animal- Medical Center and they fixed him up. They thought he had a mass in his body but I did not want to open him up. He got better as everday I went home from my job at lunchtime and fed him with a syringe. Pretty soon he was eating on his own but the syringe caused a scab in his cheek and he had to wear a halo hat- it scabbed up, came off and finally cleared up and fresh fur grew there.
When I got married, the cats moved up here. Bowie was not happy about the nmove but he adjusted nicely and was with us for a few yrs in Westchester when he succumbed to lung cancer. It was the worst as he died in the apartment and I cancelled putting him to sleep that morning as he was eating- that day I kissed him and tasted death. That night he was having such a hard time- my husband and I were like- It's OK Bowie- you can go- He died in a far corner of the apartment- I picked him up and he was already gone- I did not know it until his tail would not go into the cat carrier. He probably had a heart attack while I picked him up on the way to the carrier. Poor thing- At least he got to die at home. I am crying now so have to stop. My husband took him to the vet the next morning and I have his ashes and pictures surrounding him- My other cat was so upset she just ate and sat on a box upstairs for a week straight- so sad. 2 weeks later my husand found an adorable grey tabby at Petsmart- Elvis- we really did it for Roxie- He was not fixed and was quite a handful until he was but now, I realize it was therapeutic for me as well. I will never forget Bowie- I felt like he was my sole responsibility and we took care of each other and I will always miss him. Pets are the greatest gift and should be treated as such. You never know what the next day may bring. TBC- Nina

Frenemies

I wasn't sure if I spelled it right or wrong but the point is we all know them, don't we. The kind of people who want to hang out with you and love you and want you to do well but well, not too well and definitely not better than them! All of a sudden- you do 1 thing they don't like and bam- they totally bitch out. Then we make nice we them until the next time- It's like a habit witht hese people- they are very controlling and when they can't control the natural order in their own lives- Boom- they lash out at you. Well, you know what- when you get to a certain age- it isn't worth the energy to get upset- maybe they had a bad day, a bad childhood or
a bad mood- that doesn't mean we have to catfight back. The best thing to do is act as nice as possible until the frenemy goes their own way again. I have had too many bad experiences with them and I tell you, now I can count a handful of sincere, close friends. A real friend doesn't write nasty things about you and try to piss you off even if all you've ever done is be nice to them even when they don't deserve it.
Anyway, red flags are always up with 1 or 2 frenemies I know so it's never totally shocking when the ball drops.

I know people read my blog and will never admit it- hence- a compliment which they cannot give so I will refrain from naming them but they seem to always live up to their name- Frenemy.

A lot of times I recognize I would be friends with people like my family- never complimentary- making digs, ignoring me but feel that since I've grown and done many intersting things as an adult- these people are around less and less and I've really grown from the experience. I alwyas feel a level of uncomfortableness in my stomach as I never know when a nasty dig will shoot out of their mouth.
You hate them but because you share a certain history- you love them too- but now, better to love them from afar.

Do women have more frenemies than men? I would guess yes- Women are just by nature- cattier- you never hear men sitting in a coffee shop or drinking beers gossiping about their golf buddy that he has put on weight or his plugs looks really bad. Just does not happen- Gay men on the other hand- they are the best to gossip with and usually make the best friends also!!!

TBC- Nina-

Gosh, can't believe I haven't posted anything since May 11th. I need to focus on myself again. Can't imagine people with families- probably really hard to get own personal time in- which is important- one I can see- two- no time- just like your body becomes emeshed in others. Reunion was fun and for a week a whirlwind of photos popping up. It was fun, like going back to a much easier time- of course it was-it was HS- still, so much anxiety in my house- never felt quite relaxed until I was hanging out with my friends on my own drugged up to numb the pain.
Still waiting to sell house, one guy came back with his parents - said his realtors would contact ours- Well, that was Sun- Today is Thurs and no news. Seems like an oddball- alwyas came late- claiming his realtor told him the times were 2-4. He is not coming back in again- Oddly enuf, my MPV player is now missing. No accusations- just sayin'- maybe I left it at friends place. Lets see- Fri going into city to see Sucks in the City- apparantly bad reviews but with my friend so who cares and we'll go out after. Sat- b-b- que in NJ at our friends and Sun and Mon hopefully beach and park,
Franks still interviewing and has to go to Alabama in 2 weeks for an interview- I know- ugh- they are flying him out here and paying for everything so he might as well go. I PRAY the Cornell job comes thru- I know he really wants that one and it would be an easy transisition. I am looking forward to getting my hair treatment- about time- have to because getting head shots June 18th and hair has to look great in pix- also pray my gyno results come back neg on everything. Please God!!!

Anyway- That's it- I will try to write more regularly- there has to be a book in here somewhere, right???

xo- Nie

Feel kind of guilty- haven't blogged in a while- Have reunion coming up- hope all goes smoothly and really hope nobody brings up embarrassing moments from past- they will deal with it- just want to have fun/

Hope Roxy will be OK without me home- Frank and Elvis tend to bond and she is left alone- hopefully she will hang out with them.

I look forward to going to Scoobees for breakfast more than anything else- bacon, bacon, whose got the bacon!!!

TBC- Nina- AH, guilt time over- back to being non- productive!!

Really pissed- Not only did I have such severe PMS last night- got period early-
25 days- so erratic now- pre- menopause buit My FRONT toooth bonding came out and just had it redone March 4th- What the #^&*! My dads' birthday is Sat and now I have to rearrange my haircut appt- Is he using shoddy materials??? Better get fixed- I look like something out of HEE Haw- maybe I can do Hee Haw- The Sequel!!!
And he better not even bring up a veneer! Can't even go there!!!

Well, it has been a while since my last blog- almost 2 weeks. The prooblem is my aimless sched. It has to have more purpose- I get on Farmville late and am too tired to write. Now I get on earlier and don't care as much. So our place is on the market and I think it's going to be tough. We have no idea where we are going and I wish we could move back to NYC - that would excite me- Pittsbugh might be Ok or even upstate for awhile. most of the time I am on the computer anyway so as long as the cats are happy and we are near a PetSmart, Walmart, some decent stores and movie theaters- TJ Maxx, I'm good to go and when I go to NY- I'll stay the weekend. I would like a decent job with benefits so that is the next step. Job Security is really important to me especially now since the big # is around th ecorner. I hope to stay healthy and hope all my loved ones are as well, especially my husband, the cats and my parents and sisters. Franks neice should be giving birth on my dads birthday- May 1st-her due date- Hope everything works out with her. She is a very nice girl. Well, this is a start. I must use my water pik now and get ready for bed. I hope Brett Michaels gets better- I feel bad for him. So sad. xo- Nins

April 15th!!!

Wow- I thought I'be be this big shot blogger who everyone would know and u know what- I am spending a lot of time on my virtual time- I believe it really is my farm. I wish it was- it is pretty and spacious and I have some areas where u can just relax. Some peoples farms just are pack- racks- tons of crap just to get to higher levels but it is so cramped. A real farm would not look like that!
Anyway, it is fun. Board meeting on garage tonight- should not affect buyers as it is a positive improvement- we'll see- At least it got us to clean up the place.
I want to dish more on current events but too tired from FV- Damn You- Farmville!!!
Love You Farmville!!

Freeday

Know why I call it Freeday- Because I do not work Fridays- so it's a Freeday and I am enjoying it. I am now feeling better about the move- stuff will finally be thrown out- put up for sale or given away. The area we are thinking of in within an hour so I really hopes it works out. No more talk- no jinxing- First this place has to be sold first. Cross fingers. Kittys freak out.

I am really upset about hearing about the Russian boy being sent back to Russia by himself on an airplane. He must have been so scared. Everyone knows Russias' orphanages are tough and a lot of the kids may have fetal alcohol syndrome as well but there are some cases wher the adoptions are positive.

A friend of my friend adopted a Russian girl about 6 or 7 yrs ago when the little girl was 4 and I hear she is an angel and doing very well, she is adorable. I think a lot of it is who is doing the parenting. These poor Russian kids and all parents who treat adoption like disposable trash. It sickens me. Now other parents who want to adopt from Russia cannot because of this mess. Note to Russia: Treat your oprphans well and do not abuse them mentally or physically- A lot of people want these kids and if you do not treat them well, they will have severe mental and physical problems when people who want to give them a loving home try to adopt them and now that is on hold. This whole situation needs to be examined more carefully.

TBC- Nina

Thirdday Nite

Well, finally put apartment up- scared- hate moving- building is so messed up-
what can u do- hopefully everything will work out- Been here long enuf. Have to break it to my parents- will miss friends, this will not be easy.

Sigh!

Sundae Night

Saw Hot Tub Time Machine - It was funny- Thought it would be dumb but surprised it kept my interest. Jon Cusak is one of my favs and all actors were good- a little too much cursing but then again- always roo much cusing in movies- Just for Fun- Go see it-

Still have a long list of ther movies- Single Man- others- tried cannot think of-
Tired now- Happy Easter- must do thi earlier- Had unbelievable Haagen - Daz vanilla milkshake with oreo cookie- so good-

Nice Easter Work tomorrow- then must hit gym!!!! TBC!

Be Safe- Nina

April Foos Day

Thank God it is April 1st- hubbys feeling better, a scorny as it sounds- It is nice spring as finally sprung- To see flowers aside from Farmville is amazing-

Weather was beautiful today and just shot some stuff around town- not exciting but the color is real rich and the sky wa sso blue - it was nice- taking it with me tomorrow- Happy Easter- I'll try to write again soon!

Twoday Night

I went to my neighbors for dinner and she made this incredible brisket. It was so good and just hung out with her and her husband, nice time- I went home and my husband is still not feeling well even though he had sinis surgury Fri so figure I should just keep quiet until he feels better. Maybe he would feel better if I made 80 grand, so would I believe me!! My friend is so nice- she brought him a plate of food and cake for desert. He said he got hungry and ate so he will eat it tomorrow. Feel like eating it tomorrow. I try to be nice and really wish people would treat me the same or else I see trouble ahead. Tent City here I come!

Sundae

Ok, feel better today- have good feeling reunion will still be at same place and I can still go- a lot of people like me, some do not- that is life! I know! , sound like Sally fileld when she accepted her Oscar and said " You like me- You really like me"- She will never live that down! I plan on enjoying myself no matter what!

Anyway, my friend invited me for passover dinner Tues night= that made me feel good- Too many yrs up until recently I relied on my mom- neither me or my sister make it-
both married to Gentiles so that is the story but sometimes I crave matza ball soup, chopped liver and all that good stuff. That is what I miss most about living in the city- you could get what u wanted whenever u wanted it- I used to live by the original 2nd Ave deli and it was great- I'd always get free samples while I waited- chopped liver on Challah bread, I used to get matza ball soup, chopped liver and
chalah bread was always given out. Good Times, So sad when owner was murderd- he was a really nice guy. Sometimes I'd eat in there and once I took a gf of mine there and this old Jewish couple next to us were so fascinated that she was a Christian enjoying this type of food. They ignored me the whole time but it was like she was a celebrity to them! Right out of a Seinfeld episode! I'm getting hungry- have to go now- will write more later- For those reading - Thanks and spread the word!

Sootday Nite

Today was exhausting. worked earlier, had to clean up, Franks healing nicely- Thank God but was quite irritated about this whole Hs Reunion thing. I sent my check in earlier think it would be at 1 venue- only finding out it will be at an even more inconvenient location further out east on Lung Island. The person I am supposed to go with takes her time geting back to me. I could understand that to a point buecause she has a child or maybe she does not really want to go with me. The people with much deeper pockets had failed to send their money in as said, which reminds me more of why I wanted to get out of that neighborhood in the first place. People say one thing and do another- fuckin' annoying! Plus, the hotel room rate is much higher and if that friend decides not to go, I'm not going becasue I really do not want o spend 200 plus 2 round trip train tickets for what may feel like the longest night of my life. Now- we wait unitil Wed and see what happens, either way, I'm Ok with it-
I could use the 75 back that I wrote for this thing in so far advance- it is just so funny how some people do not mind telling u where they spend their money but are so tight at letting it go for other things. I'm direct and find some people can''t handle that. The older I get, the less I want to please people. My goal is to get more involved with my writing, start stand- up again- found some places to go by comics on FB in the city- and just stop giving a shit. If I felt like this long ago, well, it is pointless to go back- only forward. I will write again soon- possibly about my make believe reunion, which might be better than the real one anyway. Just as well.

Thurday

Thank God it is Thurs- My husband is getting sinus surgury and I hope and pray everything willl go OK. I hope it goes smoothly and he is in a better mood and feels like his old self.

I have to go to sllep now- we have to be at hospital early tomorrow- good cafe' there and I'll bring some books and mags- better pack em up now!

Good night- xo- Nie

Sunda Night Again

I hate politics, isn't everything political though- you know that as an adult- lucky kids don't- so innocent and fresh. I hate watching the stocks and stuff, I hope this HC plan gets
gets fixed after it passes or it is totally going to suck- Watch the health insurance company stocks go up- Gross- like buying tobacco stock- This is a setup. No public option and believe me, the health insurance companies will always win- along with the bankers. People are shit to them- especially poor people- this place- America is getting more like a caste system every day- Of course, in the city- you never knew how much money peeeps had but up here in Westchester and Ct- you sure do-
it is like that in the suburbs- a real race to beat your neighbor or at least be equal to them, glad I do not have to play that game- not here where I live.
Money is great but the love of money is bad. Remember the difference and you will be fine. I said that. I did not quote anyone. Nancy Pelosi seems so phony- she looks more like a PTA mom. I find anything that comes out of her mouth useless and boring- I do not like her as Speaker of the House. I ran out of eye stuff Fri and got more-
I ran into Sephorra like i had not had water for days, i had to met my friend and only had minutes to spare- gasping- i ask- where's the skin cream section- Wheres' Clarique- not the name- never remember it but so happpy to get it. Like I was happy again- so pahthetic- so glad it's spring- now it can be fun and bright again, Winter did go fast though! Goodnight, Nie

Twoday

Twoday is almost over and I am tired from being a good houswife all day and writing in dark- I do not care- Niece in Neece- no- funny but Jamaica- I know- spelled Neece wrong! Jamaica my blog friend who admits to reading blog.
I am so tired now- must sleep and dream happy thoughts-

Great- Midweek is here- Polished my nails and ready for fun.

Hate people who brag and exaggerate- We all know them- FB is famous for it- Oh, I did this- had this gig- we rocked- I am soo fabulous, blahn blah, brag- I got no love as a kid- boo - hoo-

Question- That romance writer who got her bf to pay for her IVFs- she was 49- Thought there was age limit on that - anyway- til whenever....

Moonday

Today is Moonday. I woke up late, exhausted and we were out of milk. Great, how would I drink my cofee. Turns out it is not so bad black, if you let it cool down a bit. I used to put cream cheese in it but the cream cheese went hard Steaming black coffee is a definite no- no. Then I proceed to call my bank to get my check deposit- They put my 401 K back in again and when I finally got the # of the woman in charge- who initially screwed up on the first time I said I did not want it,that was fixed for next check but apparantly- new payroll system- she apologized and forgot to put the new "code" in- funny when higher ups screw up, they just laugh it off. I had a splittling migraine all day and think it's from stress plus I have
this lightbulb that my husband put in that was in another lamp- but this lamp is more exposed and the light is too bright- It's like the interogation light.
I look up at it and say I did nothing wrong before I start work, along with painting on a Hitler mustache. Well, another celebrity couple split up- Sam Mendes and Kate Winslet- This is her 2nd director husband- guess she wasn't getting any good movie roles so time to move on- kinda surprised- she was prob cheating on him- she's always naked in movies. Tired, mor tomorrow- goodnight Moonday!

Sundaes

I've decided to call my blog for today-
Sundae- So much better than Sunday- the day before the Monday blahs- Maybe I'll change everyday of the week so it is a special day. Something to think about.
Now really want ot see the movie Runaways about the band Joan jett started. Can't get Cherry Bomb out of my head. The female- yah! Another female director used to direct music videos has an interesting background. Got good reviews. I remeber when Isaw Richard Linklaters' Dazed and Confused- so cool and Cherry bomb stood out inthat movie also. Feel like seeing that again too.
Went to my sisters this morning to say hi to my neice and wew eeg oing to goout for breakfast but ny sister vancelled and I did not get msg anyhoo in time so I drove over there- It was nice- my neice made omelots and we all just talked. She is so pretty and thin! she is going on a lovely spring break trip - Wow! To be 20 again and she is very sweet and nice- I love her a lot. Anyway, it started thunder and lightening so loud like in a horror movie so I wass caredd riving back but it was fine- no crazies on road. Left around 12:30 when storm was starting up again.
OK< Desperate Houswive is on now- will continue later!

Too Stressed

I have not written in a while, I've been really upset. I have cabin fever and was all set to go into the city on Fri and have a little fun which used to be much more often. Anyway, I go to sleep Wed night- brush my teeth- everything fine- I wake up Fri and my bonding came off my front tooth and I look like I belong on Hee- Haw. This is not good. I immediately call my dentist and get to see him later that day, He does the job, always talking about a veneer- I told him- I would if I had the money- you know I'm vain and he left me alone but at the rate of these bondings-
hopefully this will last a few more yrs and I can afford the veneer next time- 1,000 bucks- too me it's a lot of money- clothes, vacation or nothing- as the usual.
I am living week to week, paycheck to paycheck and now had to dip into my savings. I keep hoping the magical fairy will make things right again but so far she has not cast her spell on me. I send out resumes', nothing. I've never seen anything like this. Now Cablevision has taken off ABC- How is this even allowed? I really feel like this counry is turning into Russia- I'm so pissed. It's not the point- Oh, we all know who is gonna win- I feel like I am sitting with them- laughing with Brad and Angelina, sharing looks with Jeff Bridges- giving him a thumbs up for his performaace and yes, of course I'll be at Wolfgang Putz' party eating all those delicious foods in the shape of Oscars- all the losers are going to look at all the Oscar Shaped food and starting freaking out. Fuck these Oscars! I'm doing a reality show- Goodnight and Godbless Everyone except Cablevision- you guys suck!!

Hi Everyone! Today is Fri and my cabin fever has now expanded into Villa Fever.
I was all excited to get out of the house today and go to Rye and get my haircut and conditioned but of course- snowstorm- nt like I am walking Red Carpet soon- so I'll go on Sunday- noone will care- My husband and the cats are good with it.

So since my last blog my buddy from College called me back- guess I was overreacting about his wife- he said she was cool and she has a huge network of friends- We caught up on old times like it was yesterday and it was great to hear he has twin boys and also glad to hear he married someone his age and not this young chickster he had been dating yrs ago when I last saw him the summer before I turned 34. Wow- long time- Anyway- he comes to Long Island from time to time on business so it would be great catching up with him.

On another story- I like to write on FB comments and updates and maybe do so like lots of other comics/people do daily status updates- Noone seems to mind and I actually get a lot of positive feedback but there are a certain few who question my writing and even my pix- Why? I don't get it- I think a lot of it has to do with regressing back to HS because most of the people who aren't making positive comments are from my childhood- I am nice and supportive and it kinda bugs me when people have tolike "question stuff". i would never do that but I do not know these people at all anymore. I really hope the reunion is fun and nobody brings up negative stuff from the past. People will be drinking and anything comes out of peoples' mouth. I like reconnecting with peeps as long as it stays relaxed and easy- who has time now for hassles?

Anyway- I'll write more later- I am going to work out and hopefully it won't be packed as most people took a snow day. Later, Nina

Too Many Pringles/ Do Not Call Male Friends from Collegee

So, did it again.... A while ago I got something on an email which I innocently thought was directly from my old college alumni- ASU- (It was from a company that sucks colleges in to do all kinds of promos for the colleges-) I know- even I can't think of my school without picturing shots of tequila and well, let's leave out the rest. This school was not my first choice but that is another story.. Anyway,
the email says- Wouldn't you like a CD-rom from 80-83 seeing where all your college friends are doing now. I think OK, Think some more and sick of thinking- Do IT- they even ask for a recent photo- they did not use it- I pictured it as a video of peoples faces and writing next to it- it is set up like a chart- you know- like an X- Cel spred sheet- and it is so boring. The letters run from A-Z and you click on the last name of the person you are looking for- you HAVE TO put he year you are looking for in the beginning or else you have to reinstall the whole progeam! Then you click on persons' last name- Problem is- Everyone I knew had nicknames and the people who I remembered their first names, I did not remember their last names. So there you have it. I found 3 people to call, an old roommate who was like a frenemy- a girl i knew who lived in this coool house with me and 4 other people who was an art major- finally got her on the phone- noone had their email but let me keep going- She did not know at first who I was, so I kept talking and slowly her memory came back to who I was- (always fun-) and we had a nice chat- She said she is on FB- prob under her husbands name- so did not find her- then their was my friennd Bob. He had an email address but 2 days after I sent it it got kicked back.

Then I called his house- The last time we saw each other, I was almost 34 and he was in Long Island on business from Honeywell- that big company- I really do not know what they make besides thermostats which I always got yelled at for touching it to make it warmer. Funny how parents automatically know when you touch the thermostat- even if they are on vacation- I was so obedient I did not do it but my oldest sister did. The answer was always- Put on a sweater- should have been more like- Put on your winter coat- Kill a bear and wrap it around your body- anyway- back to the story- Anyway- I take the train out and we drive around long Island, go to Roslyn for lunch- he tells me his GF is 10 yrs younger and it is hard because she always wants to go dancing- at that time he was 37 so I really do not get it anyway- That was it- I told him I was in a relationship with a black man which I could tell he did not like- blood vessels in neck popping a good sign- since he was from South Side of Chicago and they were racist as I found out by how many times him and his South Side buddies used the N word and thought Jewshad horns- I was almost convinced I had horns!!!. Very different from NY. Anyway, he was fun and I would visit him a couple of times after graduation- the first time I told him I wanted to move out there and he was looking for places for me- being like not even 23, I changed my mind and moved to NYC- then, at 25 went back to visit an old bf in college- who broke my heart and was evil but of course- I stayed with him anyway-
The last night I was to leave- he stayed out all night and his rommate took me to the airport to go to LA- I hated him then but was glad to visit other friends from LA- saw Bob- the guy I have been talking about among others- one night we all went out to a club in Holywood and he was going out with someone else- then at 28- we reconnected and I visited him- I think it was in LA- I can't remember and it was fun. We weren't boyfriend/girlfriend but more buddies- he was a lot of fun. Anyway, assuming he had a family- whether he married that girl who was 10 years younger or not is besides the point- I called because his email got kicked back- The first time- noone was home and an answering machine went on- It was like- so peppy- like Arizona people- Hi- you've reached Dani, Bob, Chase and Tyler- I know- cute names for boys, right? So I hang up- not wanting to leave a msg- I waited a little while- call back- She answers I ask for Bob and she kinda acts freakish on the phone- like Shes' Elin Woods and i am one of Tigers' mistresses'- asking me how do I know Bob- I say I am an old college freind and just got the CD- rom Arizona alumni and she's like Bob doesn't belong to the ASU Alumni- I say I am just callling a bunch of old friends- she says- Hold On- and says Honey- Did DADDY go exercising- really loud saying Daddy- She comes back to phone and I leave my # but I know whether she gave him the msg or just gave him hell, I'll probably never hear from him again. Wish I could return the damn CD!! Anyway- Walking to Walgreens is a big treat for me - When it opened- you would have thought Cirqued De Soleil came to town.. Seriously, I work from home and when I need air- I take a walk and usually stop thre, pick up some Spanish words and look thru the aisles- Always PRINGLES 2 for 3.00- lately- for the last few weeks - I have been buying them- I love the pizza ones and some other types but my husband only likes regular Pringles- Bland and cheddar cheese kind- so does the cat- the other story seems somehow bettr buit I will keep everyone posted on how my Pringles habit is going- I HAVE TO STOP!!!! Have a lovely day! Nina

Hi- it is Friday and no work- hooray!!! Freedom Day- I just watched Tiger Woods speech and find it very unconvincing- So contrived and he must have gotten a stiff neck from reading his prepared speech - prob not first time he was stiff- haha- LOL
saw that coming- OK- I'll stop- even though he did not!!! hee hee

Who cares about Golf anyway- Except the people who make money off him- Thy were the ones giving him the biggest hugs of course! And Mom- so sentimental and heartwarming- makes sure camera picks that shot up! Who the heck were the peeps in the audience- looked like a town Hall meeting like politicians have- would have been funny if Joe the Plumber showed up- Ha ha

Can't wait for Olympics to be over- If I wanted to watch outdoor sports- I'd play in the snow- I remember playing in the backyard of my house for hours- making snow angels, anything- my mom would call me in after many hrs- of course At that point I had frostbite but that's another story. Hamsters, does anyone buy them as pets anymore- We had them- Of course- when we purchased them, they failed to mention the
fact that the female hamsters eat their young if not separated- so one day- look at cage- all the babies are gone- I remember having vivid dreams of my very unfinished basement with tons of neglected hamsters and no water in their bottles and we forgot all about them and then they showed up- alo had dreams homeless men snuck in the basement window and lived in the basement- my basement was soooo scary- like horror- movie scary- 2 lights in it- one for the stairs and one light bulb hanging on a string above the washer and dryer- when my mom asked me to take the clothes out of dryer for her- I remember I could not get out of their fast enough- I had nightmares of that basement for along time- among other nightmares- like my childhood- Half LOL- Well, time to get out and see any decent movies are playing or take a nice walk- need to REALLY unclog my brain- Later- Nina

Remember my song- my husband remebered how it went- it it so funny- can't wait o sing it live somewhere in comedic form. Warching show about undercover CEOs pretending they are regular workers to see how their company is working. Tonightis Hoters CEO- seems like nice guy- divoreced, 3 kids- I won't giveit away but at end discover itis Hooters CEO as in every show- workers discover worker is ownerof company. OK.
used to watching Desperate Housewives but Winter Olympic sis on and can't wait hat because of poor limoge guy died in training- poor kid told his father 2 days before he was cared of the track. Kind of puts a damper on the Death Olympics/

PS- John Edwards continues to nausate me daily- also surprised Jeff Goldblum was involved with her- always like him- will this saga ever end??

Away for weekend- Just last night but was really nice to get away 1 night- always nice to stay ina hotel. Now, today- my husband is set on fixing sink sohe went to Home Depot to get pipes. Romantic, right- Ke had better come back with some flowes is all I'm sayin' I had a song in my head about being a nasal spray terrorist- forgot it- My husband might remember the song. It is pretty funny.

I haven't been watching Olympics- used to be into the Luge events and winter sports but so sad that young guy died in training- Hello- make it safer- not that hard- they need to put up a protective wall- much more dangerous than car racing if you ask me- not that I would know. I get scared just going to the trash room.

Ha ha- Just wanted to get my chops going. Cats are sooo happy we are back, Very tired today. Going to take a nap now.

Hi, Today is Saturday- Feel better. Got my hair done yesterday and they were badgering me about the Keratin treatment- which, if I get it on Wednesdays is only 300 dollars- sounded like a good idea considering I get 50 dollar treatments every time I het a haircut anyway but this is like a twice a year deal. I agreed but I am not going to take Wednesdays off just to get it done- Fridays is when I have off and if they can't do it on a Fri- forget it- I can always go somewher else and since I'm working part- time- I'll just jeep doing what I'm doing until I feel I can indulge- right now- it's not necessary- I already bought a new round brush there for 25 bucks and a conditioner for my hair for 25 bucks and last time I got hair oil there wich I haven't evened opened yet and I tip well. I have to keep reminding them- I may look like Greenwich but I'm
not from the Mayflower- I'm from Ellis Island- well, my relatives were- same thing.

I had anxiety about it until I made a decision and called- made my next full head highlight appt end of March and no Keratin treatment appt .

Then I'm working today and get an email from my manager saying that I am eligible for 401K- and I work part-time and I have to fax back either if I want to take part or not on Feb 15 payperiod. So if I do not scrurry up on this- it's like fuck you- we warned you and 3% will automatically be taken out of my check. I know this fund gives the school a kickback for getting people signed up but c'mon- I'm part- time- I need all my money- Sounds like Russia if you ask me.

I made a nice steak sandwich tonight for us- marinated in portobello mushrooms, garlic, chil powder and some kosher salt. Into kosher salt now cause Rachel Ray always uses it and whatever she does, I do- She's my cooking goddess. The bread was warm and crusty and putting the mushgrooms with the olive oil mixture made it taste great. After All, can't eat chicken all the time- that's Land of the Bland- I like that- used to always say that onstage- Where i live- Land of the Bland!!! No Meat Market fasionistas walking around here! Plenty of Muffys, Biff and Chip! Not like Chip from My 3 Sons- He was a nice boy- I really like that show- they never even have it on TV Land- remember Uncle Charlie!

Oh my Gosh- My computer froze and I shut it off the usual short quick way but this time it did not work and my husband had to reinstall it and I lost all my photos,
always deleting everything from my sent file- dumb but like in real life I hate clutter. I really panicked! At least I habe my blog account and my FB account and I will need my other stuff- like my work sign- on.
I can't believe how attached I got to all those pix. At least I have some on FB.
That helps. I had a rough day and was bombarded with appointments and really need to go slower, I was so burnt out at the end of day and it is not like I am getting any commissions like my other jobs- When will things be normal gain!!!

I'm exhausted and disgusted- Gotta go now

Well, it is Monday- Feb 1st and I pray that groundhog sees his shadow- right- that's how it goes?- Remember last year when Bloomberg was trying to get the ground hog out and ground hog bit him- That was really funny- maybe he did not want him to run for a 3rd term and that was his wayof letting us know.

So tired- have to wash face and put all the keeep me young looking crap on, Accomplished a little today- at least worked out- ate healthy and willl try to be disciplined until Fri.
Am tired, missed Men of a Certain Age- love that show but worth missing it as talking with good friend- They should have a reality show- Pre HS reunion- All about people getting ready for their HS reunion and the anxieties they go thru remembering HS and peopel and stuff- That would be good- wish I could write more- have to do this earlier instead of feeding cows on FM- Anyway- TTYL- Nina-

I have one friend that admits to following my blog- If anyone else is following my blog- please send me an email on FB or write on my wall- Thanks!

So far- the eye cream is good but may try something else or Retin- A again- seems good
so far- got it Nov 20 so hopefully it'll last at leas t 3 months.
gotta watch the grammys- got adorable new dress for summer/spring at Marshalls- went yesterday with my friend to look at it- bought cute top- then he called me and talked me into getting the dress- hubby like it also. Bought soup for this week for dinner and may throw in chcken breast-- ate Chinese food and pasta all weekend and can't wait to go to gym and work out!

Gotta watch Lady Gaga now- I'm so gaga over Gaga!
Bad romance is great! Later, Me

Today better day. Whettie more optimistic about work stuff and that make sme feel more at ease. I also got a nice Associte Outstanding Achievement Award from my job along with a 25 dollar gift card- Obviously, can't buy much but I am sure they have a budget for the year allocated for this stuff. It is also good for my self- esteem all around.

I wrote some jokes tonight and got some good comments on FB- wonder if they will be on these late night shows. I know these writers go on FB and look for funny stuff- who is gonna know- must be more plagarism going on now than ever.

Ate lots of pasta tonight but worked out hard. Tomorrow busy day- work, cat food errands, maybe Costco and Jeff visit Fri- Ugh- vacum- should be fun- have not seen him in almost a yr- since March'09 so that will be nice- maybe we'll go to that Asian place for lunch near me and Marshalls after- Do I dare? Gotta go now and wash my face and put my red wine anti- eye wrinkle cream on. Think it's helping. OK, later- Nina

Tonight is Tuesday, feel much better than yesterday. We will prob still move but it won't hapen overnight. First, we have to find a place we like- go back if we like it- Big decision and selling this place is not going to be easy. An average range of time is about 3 months- we'll see- One day at a time. I just think- who will I really miss- some of my friends but that isn't a main reason to stay. Myparents even though I only see them once a month for about 4 hrs. I am not close with my sister and hardly ever speak to her, I have tried but it's time to just move on- we just aren't close and most likely never will be. I used to go there when the kids were little- they adored me then and I used to count how many words she would say to me- Barely talked to me- I was always uncomfortable but put up with it because I wanted the kids to love me. If I say it's raining out, even if it is, she will say- no it isn't- After a while, a pattern emerges. Most people care about their significant others and thier kids and their own lives but they can get on without you. as long as they can communicate with you and tell you what's going on with THEM, everyones' happy. NYC- yeah, I miss it but when I go in I see memories not the way it is now but what I remember- going out, relationships, the good times even when I was broke and doing comedy- everyone was doing it and it seemed like a group collaboration. I think I liked that mor e than actually going up. It made me feel less lonely. Always someone to talk to, usually it was about them but still- it was nice for a while. I just want to move somewhere where there is a little nightlife, a cute little city. Some culture- Nothing like
Port Chester. I have to change the name of my blog- It's really not Just Ask nina- that is more of an advice column idea I had way back- I have a new name- Time to look for Edit Blog Name, shall we!

Brain is under construction... come back tomorrow- A lot is going on now and I have a lot tothink about! Scary!

Goodnight!

Another Lazy Sunday!!! SURPRISE

Ok, so I first get up at 6:45- late for the cats and feed them- hubby mad- woke him up- BRRr-

I was throwing leftover cat food down drain and woke him up - BAD MOVE! They climb on me- not him and I really did not want to plug up sink but so early in morning- much easier than throwing it down garbage- Husband wakes yp- mad- sleeps on couch- I go back to bed- cats happy as usual- that's it- Watched SAG awards last night- kinda not exciting- since Golden Globes was last week- too much- too soon- Academy Awards the best- thought that Inglorous Basratrds won for best ensemble cast and Mo'nique and SANDRA Bollock won again- Monmique smart this time- covered her legs totally- shaving is a pain- and it is like going around in a circle- have to keep doing it. Lucky she's got a man who doesn't care. I use Mach 2 blades and they are the best- but still- legs, armpits- stomach area- Whu can'y I be French! Damn it!!



We are trying to move elsewhere because it's to expensive n Westchester- We need to go where taxes are low but health insurance is not too bad- this been going on since last yr but then my husband got a good job but it ended and it was not supposed to and now he is bitter and I think it's time- We have no kids- just want the move to be OK for the cats and my parents live here My dad has Alzheimers- it's scary- when u get married u think birdies and nice music wonder- maybe if I had a kid- would not seem so bad- now you need mucho bucks to have a kid-
.

It always catches up with you. At least meopause should take up some of my whining in next 3 years!!

I am so tired but have to be disciplined and write on here everyday. It's Conans' last night- bittersweet and just really nice to watch him. 3 minutes he's gone. He is so funny and I always was a fan of him. Where are my fans! He's getting 32 million, I am getting 32 cents-I can buy a mini- kit- kat bar with that, I think. I really wan to write more but am tired, have to go- Good Night All- Don't be Cynical!!

I really have nothing new to say- checked Farmville- Top Priority= Facebook Witty Banter
and remembered- Ohm yeah- i have a blog now-I am important. I worked today, went to gym- made dinner, watched some TV and cleaned litter box. A good friend of mine is coming up tomororw so I HAVE to vacum- and wash hair but got snacks and wine already and all I have to do is go see my shrink during the day- In Greenwich where everyone is blond and long- legged
and stepped right off the Mayflower - It is Hedge Fund City. I will go to thePet Store- get my catties a bag of salmon dry food and go to CVS in Greenwich- They are so well stocked because it is Greenwich- they even have their own security guards- no- kidding!!! I'll be driving my husbands' BMW which makes me feel good and I feel like I fit in- even though I do not. It's the look that counts and I have it- minus the Kate Spade bags and Prada clothes. I used to go into Saks to buy Mac and Bobbi Brown makeup but it got so humiliating because no one ever came over to me- like I was of no value- They must have smelled that lack of money on me. Meanwhile, they are working in the store so Hellooo- why should they have attitude- Even the cops in Greenwich and the gardeners in Greenwich are snobby! ha ha
Goodnight- Try to be more amusing tomorrow!!!

I am so glad is Wednesday, Wednessday is tough. I work all day- take a break to check FB- check on my fake farm- and work some more. Trying to be nice on the phone but easy when you get paid for it- no matter it's a paycheck which is very much needed. I have no food in my house and for lunch ate low- fat swiss cheede slices and for dinner a canned salmon that was sitting here for quite a while. Lettermans' gushing about how cute Scott Brown is. I guess everyone is. That cosmo pix of him is nice- he still looks good. I guess him for 50 or 32 tops. I have a reunion coming up in May- have mixed feelings about it- I am sooo different from HS- but I gueess a lot of people have changed. Hopefully! It's just weird- Heres; how reunion goes- You go from Hi- your family is rally cute- how old are your kids? toNo, I have no kids, married yeah, I used to do comedy and before know it- you are telling the waiters the and the bartender your life story- you know why- cause your HS friends really don't give a shit! It's all about how many peeps show up and can we turn over a profit. It is a good deal. I'm just worried after a half hour- bye- bye- Like that 30 Rock episode- so funnny.
OK- tired- Have to get to bed- more tommorrow! So happy they rescured some Haittian children today- Finally, some good news coming out of there.

I was so happy- my friend from LA told me she like my blog. I was happy- She likes what I wrote about the cat. I want comments, comments, comments. I'll have to learn how to figure this out.
Not comments about me but comments on opinions about things people want to write about. Things that matter to you.
Negativity is just a waste of time so please if you are going to read this, have something positive to add- fine.
So now Obama is really screwed- Brown won and now we won't get that "great" health coverage we were expecting. It won't matter to us but it will matter to Obama and the Democratic administration. Maybe if he did what he said he would do during his campaign instead of pissing off so many Americans with no change, this would not happen. The only change in the White House is in his pocket.

This is so funny. noone is following me. Had that feeling- this is like a diary online- Oh, I picked my nose- my foot hurts. I take psyllium husks like it's going out of style. Actually, read a funy authorI liked that he took it every night and it really made him regular- all's I'm sayin/ Nobody is going to read this but me. I could have just started writing on word and sent it to a publisher to get rejected. - I could pretend to be someone else and then maybe other would follow but is it really worth my time. I've more important things to do- like play Farmville- watch Billy Bush on
that gossip show every night. He seems like a friendly Bush- can't believe he is related to George Bush- although I see a slight resemblance. If I ever met him, I would not bring it up- that' be a Debbie Downer for him. Winters moving along- not quite fast enogh but when it hits Feb- then it goes fast- especially if you can get away for a few days whichis hopefully what we will do. I love going away but miss the cats sooo much, can't imagine whatit must be like to leave your kids- when they are little- when they get bigger- it's different. I am watching my cat sleep- so peaceful in her little bed- It's funny- they can go to sleep- no problem- guess because they have no anxiety- what- where's my wet food? I have to use the litter box- where's my catnip- I love animals- they are so sweet, innocent and loveable- sort of like how humans start out.

Hi- did everyone see the Golden Globe- was not so exciting- Thought they snubbed Quentin Tarantinos' movie on purpose- so glad the German actor won best supporting actor. Mickey Rourke looked like he was wearing a mask and the highlight of the night was Ricky Gervais's intro to Mel Gibson- people were spitting up laughing. To be honest, with what's going on in Haiti it was hard to watch and enjoy it while people are still over there buried alive, babies are dying, everyones' dying and where is all the US Aid??? I do not get it- this tragedy is so horriffic- I can't even bear to watch it on CNN anymore and hear the cries and moans of people and the sad
families wiping away their tears after just burying another loved one. It is so heartbreaking and what about the oprphanges? I just don't get it- reporters can get there no problem but getting aid to the dying is like- so difficult. This really sucks!! I have to go to bed now but will not be having sweet dreams, I can assure you that.

Sorry peeps- My mistake- looks like the Golden Globes are tonight. Must have benn under my usual rock. Everthings' Golden- The Golden Girls- poor Rue Mclanachan had a stroke- pray for her... so funny- not the stroke- she was as Blanche on The Golden Girls. Golden Gloves- boxing- I know so much about that and Goldens Mustard- no, that's Guldens Mustard??-- but that is really good mustard- I put mustard in and on everthing- it has no calories and adds a nice kick- not in deserts, though. That would taste weird.

Ok, better put my gown on and get all gussied up for The Golden Globes- Shoot, know that it is tonight- I have to do my own hair and makeup!!!

Lazy Sunday- Wow- My own blog- so exciting!!! I'vw not much to say- lazy day- still in bathrobe and deciding when and if, to shower. So, the big Massuchsetts Senate race is Tues- if the democrats do not win- the Senate will have less than 60 democratic votes. What do you think??

See,I'm trying to be political even though I think most of them are full of crap. Power, Power, Power and now look at Haiti- Incredible, isnt it- Now on to the next thing- Power!!!! We care we care- back to Power- It's all an act if you ask me- Everything is so carefully timed- They probably have a timer ser- OK- next thing to act like we care about!!!!

Now- On to what I really know well- the Celebs- Why are we talking about the Golden Globes now- isn't it like a week away- Can't we have some breathing space before we have to see who is wearing what designer dress- Although- I admit- I love seeing some of these celebs dress horribly- you think- Wow- they are just like me-I'd wear something stupid like that too!
Ok, shower time- Obama is getting heckled right now on TV and I thought he was pretty funny !!!